Hakuo Academy
Hello. I'm the Sanzenin family's maid, Maria.
Maria
On the job, I tend to be seen as an older woman,
but I'm still just seventee—
You've grown so big, Little President!
Hey, do you have a boyfriend yet?
Wh— Makimura-sensei, what are you...
Oh, that would be my boyfriend.
Fall for me and you'll get burned!
That's quite a reliable-looking boyfriend...
Sorry! We'll talk later!
Let us go, my honey.
A boyfriend, eh?
Huh... Huh?
I can't hear anything...
Oh, that's quite the antique.
Would you like me to fix it?
I just happen to have a broken one, too.
Hm? But, if it's broken, what's the point?
No need to worry.
Even if they're both broken,
as long as it's different parts that don't work...
They can be combined into a working one.
Like this.
Whoa!
Not bad! You really are a genius!
They don't call you a Hakuo Old Boy for nothing.
You're welcome.
But I was never at the top of my class in this school.
What? Really?
Yes. There was a genius...
A real genius, in the same grade as me.
Little President! There's been an incident!
Wait, what are you reading?
Oh, this?
It's Sunday... in Polynesian.
I'm not sure if that's an impressive book or not...
So, Vice President Makimura-san, what's this incident?
Oh! That's right! It's terrible, Little President!
Look outside!
Outside?
I hadn't even noticed!
It's cold and snow is falling! What should we do?
Let's set up the heated table, then.
That's my Little President! What an ingenious solution!
So warm...
You really are amazing though, Little President.
Skipping grades to start high school at age 10,
superior at both academics and sports,
and becoming student council president as a first year.
And so cute to top it all off!
It's absolutely criminal, Little President!
Please, stop calling me Little President already.
I have a name, you know. It's Maria.
By the way, Makimura-san, I hear you started a new club.
The Video Research Club, or something like that?
Yeah! I thought I'd make a record of your growth.
I mean, all the guys love you, so there's an obvious demand.
If you meet that demand, this school would be full of criminals...
But I've already shot quite a few.
What?
Look.
I'm sorry. My hand slipped.
Oh... Your hand slipped, eh?
Anyway, you can't show videos!
Aw, fine then...
I'll start with just sound.
I guess that's...
Oh, Experimental Caregiver Robot Number 1-kun...
Excuse me, Makimura-san.
The teacher says it's time to meet.
Oh, no! I have to declare my thesis!
I'll see you later!
Right, right.
Hurry!
This is Maria. Um, um...
I'm the student council president.
This is Maria. Um, um...
I'm the student council presiden—
Uh, okay, I will now sing a song about "Maria."
The M of Maria is for Ma—
I almost forgot, Maria...
I'm sorry. My hand slipped.
O-Okay, just be careful...
By the way,
what's on this tape?
No idea. The player's been broken all this time...
Really? Sounds interesting!
Let's listen and see what's—
You mustn't listen to it.
Whoa! Maria-san, why are you here?!
I suddenly remembered that I left something here at this school.
Wait, so that tape's yours?
That's gotta be interesting! Let us hear it!
Sure, I don't mind...
But my hand may slip.
Uh... Never mind, then.
That was lucky. I remembered just in time.
Sanzenin
We certainly got lots of mail again today.
Pizza, sushi, and even a "maid delivery service"...
This one looks quite a bit like a love letter...
To Hayate Ayasaki-kun
It's for Hayate-kun. What could it be?
Could this be a real love letter?!
It can't be, can it?
But there's a return address... and...
It has the smell of a cute girl...
Huh? A love letter for me?
So... how should I turn this one down, Maria-san?
You make your decision two seconds after receiving it?
But, you're turning her down, just like that?
What about going to meet her once,
and dating her if she's cute?
Don't you ever think about that?
Do I look that clever to you?
Sorry. I guess you don't.
But, really, how should I turn her down?
You seem like you must receive a lot of these.
Well, I did receive them all the time in high school...
But, well... they gave me a sort of criminal vibe...
I see.
Well, at any rate, I'd better read it.
I love you I love you I love you I love you
Uh... I'm not really into girls who love obsessively...
Hayate-kun... there's no guarantee on the "love" part.
W-Well, anyway, it has a return address.
I should send a letter of refusal there, right?
R-Right. As gently as you possibly can.
Are you sure about that?
Miss Nagi!
You two don't understand how to conquer obsessive lovers!
Er, it's not like I want to conquer—
There's a different anime about that.
Write it... like this!
I don't know who said anything about love or hate, but no thanks!
Send!
Preparation complete!
Preparation complete
That girl's 12,000 years too early to lay a hand on my Hayate.
Sanzenin
That was fast!
Is this the power of obsessive love?!
I'll kill you I'll kill you I'll kill you I'll kill you
And I think she's raised the bar a bit...
What should we do, Miss Nagi?!
We have no choice. If that's how it is...
We'll have to take the classic romantic comedy route!
Classic...
...romantic comedy route?
Sure is a peaceful day.
Feels a little lacking in stimulation, though...
Romantic Comedy Fair
Definitive Edition Rom-Com
The Gold Standard of Rom-Com
Staff's Pick!
That's right! In a classic romantic comedy, right about now...
Nishizawa-san!
Hayate-kun!
He looks awesome as always.
So, how about a date?
I-I'd love to!
No, no, no. That's not a romantic comedy.
Let's see... The punch line would be...
Hayate-kun!
Maria-san!
You look lovely as usual today.
Seriously?!
Commercial Connecting Theater
I hope I grow up soon...
I know this is sudden,
Celebrating 10 Episodes Character Popularity Contest
but in celebration of the 10th episode, it's a Character Popularity Contest!
The winner gets to...
...strip!
Why did you do that?
I thought it would liven things up.
Was that all you could think of to liven things up?
B-But I thought it would be fun...
How is that fun?
W-Well...
So, we can call it off, yes?
Yes.
Commercial Connecting Theater
I'm still only seventeen!
Maria-san seems like she'd use some special technique.
Yeah...
You know, I think...
that broom she's always holding actually conceals a sword,
and she goes around saying things like, "Once again, I have cut a worthless object."
No way. I say she transforms.
Every night, she turns into a pretty soldier in a mini-skirt
and punishes people in the name of the moon.
I can picture that!
Right? Ignoring the "pretty" part, at least...
What? Maria-san and I go on a date and act like we're in love?
Indeed. The girl will most likely be watching you,
so if she sees you acting like a silly couple,
she'll give up and go away!
A-Are you sure?
Yes. When dealing with an obsessive lover,
if you remove all flags early, it won't grow into a problem.
So, with that...
Operation: Lovey-Dovey Fake Date by Nagi Starring: Hayate Ayasaki, Maria
Eliminate Obsessive Lovers! Operation: Heart-Pounding Date!
And don't you get any weird ideas.
Y-Yes, sir...
So, as Miss Nagi ordered, our fake date has begun...
Shall we start by shopping for clothes, as she directed?
Don't get the wrong idea!
It was written in Miss Nagi's scenario!
Yes, I know!
I wasn't flustered or anything, so what's the problem?
But do you really think that girl will give up?
I just hope it doesn't make her even more angry.
Damn! What's with that guy?!
Holding hands with a cute maid like her!
But, now that I think about it,
this is the first time I've held hands with a boy like this.
So my first time was with Hayate-kun...
Um, is something wrong?
Huh? N-No, nothing.
I was just wondering if the plan is working...
I wonder what they're talking about...
This really is a big help, though.
We don't know anything about dates, after all, do we?
Hayate-kun, don't forget, I am older than you.
Huh? Oh... Right...
So you should treat me more like... well, an older lady.
O-Okay, I understand.
For now, let's just follow this scenario.
I see...
So, the two of them are out on a fake date right now?
Yeah. My "king of absolute obedience scenario" is the perfect plan.
Any obsessive lover who sees it will be defeated in a heartbeat.
You're amazing, Nagi.
But, you don't think it would actually fuel this obsessive girl's rage?
Huh?
Fuel her rage, eh?
Was that true?
Damn that punk! He'll pay for this!
Using the letter I wrote as a prank because I was bored
to go on a date with that maid?!
Father, what's that letter?
Nothing.
But you certainly have the sweet smell of a young girl...
I won't let him!
What? It was him?
Yes... So that's what he used the stationery I gave him for...
Oh, Hayate-kun! This outfit is so cute!
Yes. I'm sure it'll look great on you.
Go try it on, Hayate-kun!
Why me?
Well, why not?
We're here shopping together, after all.
That logic makes no sense!
Okay, I'll add it to the scenario.
"Hayate-kun buys a girl's outfit, and something stirs in him."
Don't make weird things stir in me!
Oh, look, I didn't even have to write it.
It already says, "Maria joyfully dresses Hayate as a girl."
Miss Nagi...
I lost them...
But...
I must have been imagining it.
Those two would never...
Wow! The mini-skirt looks great on you, too!
Seriously...
This isn't right, Maria-san!
Crash...
Gosh, dates are fun, aren't they, Hayate-kun?
I feel as though I've lost something.
Oh, please.
I was only following the scenario.
So was I just imagining that wild enthusiasm?
So, what happens next?
Let's see...
What's wrong?
I-It's... just...
Really, what is it, Hayate-kun?
If you don't follow the scenario,
you'll make that obsessive something-or-other angry.
Yeah, but this...
Don't argue. Do as the scenario says—
Chapter 3: Maria Strips!! (Trying on a swimsuit) (Even though she'll probably look ugly.)
D-Don't, Hayate-kun!
That voice...
Not yet!
I said, don't look at me yet!
I-I know!
Crash...
Hina-san, over here!
Ayumu?
A-Are those two...
Anyway, we have to follow them!
R-Roger!
Sorry to keep you waiting.
What do you think?
I changed into the clothes we bought, like the scenario said.
Wow! It looks great on you, Maria-san!
So, what's next?
Let's see...
Final Chapter Now that the shopping is finished, to the aquarium we GO!! (Settle everything there!!)
Nogata Aquarium
Wow! Hayate-kun, they're doing a dolphin show!
It looks that way.
Since we're here, let's watch from the front, Hayate-kun!
Maria-san! Watch out!
See? If you get too close,
the clothes you just bought will get wet.
Th-Thank you...
I-I'm sorry!
Oh, no, I'm sorry I was so...
Th-The dolphins are cute, aren't they?
Y-Yes, they are.
That wasn't good. I can't believe I got flustered over that.
As an older lady, I need to show some dignity.
Hayate-kun!
Y-Yes?
I-It's not as if I have feelings for you or anything!
Huh? Oh... Okay.
This is very bad!
I somehow feel like I've just suffered a crushing defeat!
Darn you, Hayate-kun!
Now I'm going to show you how mature I can be!
That damn butler...
Going out on a date at his age!
But I will not just stand by in silence!
If I leap into her arms in this cute body...
A kind maid like her will have no choice but to embrace me!
Oh, Hayate-kun! Look at the cute penguins!
She's here!
All right, Miss Maid, now is the time for you to kindly embrace me!
Wow! This cute penguin jumped right into my arms, Maria-san!
No! I wanted the maid to...
Getting all excited over a penguin...
You're such a child, Hayate-kun.
Uh, but...
I win!
Well, let's move on, Hayate-kun.
But, Maria-san, do you really think the sender
of that letter will give up now?
I'm not sure.
I've had fun today, though.
It feels sort of like a real date.
Has it been fun for you?
Oh... Yes...
Yes. I've had fun, too.
Welcome to Nogata Aquarium.
Hey! Hina-san!
This is the sardine area.
Sorry! I really wanted to push the button...
Oh... Hinagiku-san and...
Nishizawa-san? Why are you...
Is this my chance?
I should take advantage of this...
Wh-What are you doing here?!
Are you two going out or something?!
What?!
Of course not!
Yeah, what she said! This is just blah-blah-blah...
Wh—
Oh, that's all?
Of course!
Well, we haven't seen the dolphin show yet, so we'll be going.
Oh, okay. It was good to see you.
I guess we really did look like boyfriend and girlfriend.
Nothing less from a plan designed by Miss Nagi!
A boyfriend, huh?
Someday, I hope I'll find someone like that,
and we can be together like this...
Um, is something wrong, Maria-san?
What? N-No, nothing!
You really lack delicacy, Hayate-kun!
Huh? Hey! Maria-san!
Next Time